What it Means to Just Show UP KDS:053

This episode and post have been a long time coming.

I don’t remember when I first came up with #JustShowUP, but it’s been my mantra now for at least 6 or 7 years.

I never let it go, but I hadn’t done much with it… until now.

I don’t remember a time in my business when I felt this clear and focused.

On the one hand, my life circumstances are ideal for what I need to be doing in my business. On the other hand, this has been 100% intentional as well.

My life right now is mine.

My kids are both doing great, doing their thing, and living on their own. My dad is doing well and being as social as he can during a pandemic. It’s been a year and a half since my Mom passed and I’ve found some peace.

I live quietly by myself, in another state, and am literally doing exactly what I want to do for me.

I shared in the last podcast episode that I set the intention about 5 months ago to “raise my vibration.”

The personal work I’ve been doing with my therapist has been a game-changer. The impact it’s had on my business continually surprises me because none of the work we’re doing is directly about my business… but like most creators, I don’t really separate myself from my business

#JustShowUP

Before I get into what it means to #JustShowUP, I want to recommend a book. 

This book was recommended to me by my good friend Lisa Anderson. I bought the Kindle version right away but then went and bought the physical version as well so I could write in it, highlight things, and take notes (plus, it’s an interactive book anyway).

The book is called “3 Word Rebellion” by Michelle Mazur.

The full title is:
3 Word Rebellion: Create a One-Of-A-Kind Message That Grows Your Business Into A Movement”

I’m not even halfway into the book when I realized…

I’ve already created my “3 Word Rebellion”… in fact, I realized I have a few.

Just Show UP

Everything Is Content

F*ck the Hustle

Since it doesn’t recommend three 3-Word Rebellions, I’m going all-in with Just Show UP for my personal brand and will continue using #EverythingIsContent on both brands (this brand and Content Creators Planner).

I’m also bringing back F*ck the Hustle because I think we’ve never needed that message more. 

Life is not about packing everything into every moment, grinding so hard that you miss the things that matter, and doing what you “think” you’re supposed to do.

More on that later.

Initially Just Show UP was very literal: just show up and do the work. Even when it’s hard or you don’t want to, just show up.

I think this was inspired by two other books:

“The Obstacle is the Way” by Ryan Holiday and “The War of Art” by Steven Pressfield.

I have always read a lot of self-help, business, and spiritual books, but these two books felt, for lack of a better word, solid.

Both are about self-responsibility.

Nothing will grow your business faster than taking complete responsibility for everything. 

And when I say everything, I mean everything.

Your business growth, profits, finances, relationships, health, mental well-being… all of it.

We can’t control what happens to us but we can always control how we handle what happens to us and how we feel about what happens to us (I’m not referring to people with serious mental health issues where additional support is needed).

So there’s the first piece to what it means to #JustShowUP.

Self-responsibility.

The cool thing about self-responsibility is that it goes both ways. Meaning, we take responsibility for our mistakes AND we take responsibility for our wins. 

The key to all of this is removing the judgment (I’m speaking to myself here too). Stop looking at what you have or haven’t done as good or bad, right or wrong.

It just is.

The crazy thing about judgment is that it’s pretty much irrelevant. What I’ve found is that it’s all external beliefs that I’ve bought into. 

That being said, I know for myself it’s an ongoing process. I won’t be judgment-free until I’m not in this body anymore. 😉 

However, once you start paying attention to where you’re judging yourself (and others), it’s hard to “unlearn” that. You’ll start catching yourself doing it… which is when you have a choice to make.

Choose to feel good.

This means, removing the judgment (and side note: judging yourself doesn’t help you accomplish things or undo things, all it does is make you feel like crap).

First and foremost, your mindset is EVERYTHING.

If your mindset isn’t right, nothing else matters.

You can decide to spin out and stress over things (which never solves the thing you’re stressing about), or you can decide that you’re going to put one foot in front of the other and simply keep going.

There are a few ways I manage my mindset, but keep in mind these are what work for me. None of these things may appeal to you, and that’s O.K., but you need to find what DOES work for you before you do anything else.

• I am very deliberate in what I watch, read, and listen to (i.e., no news)
• I do little things, every day, that brings me joy (taking a bath, or 2, playing with my dogs, talking to people that are in alignment with how I feel, etc.)
• I am on a constant ‘quest’ for lack of a better word, to be the best version of myself. Not in a ‘striving’ to be a winner… but what sets my heart and soul on fire
• I limit my engagement with people who are negative or behave like victims
• If it’s not fun, I’m not doing it
• I continue talking with my therapist and will probably hire a coach or join a Mastermind next year
• I focus on appreciation and gratitude, as often as humanly possible

Mindset isn’t about the grand gestures or whether or not you have a “morning routine.”

It’s about learning to trust yourself.

Simply pay attention to how you feel doing certain things… and doing more of the things that make you feel good.

Literally, SHOW UP

(and dare I say it? do the work)

This is so much more simple than we make it (note to self). Here are some examples directly related to running an online business:

This is just a small sampling, but I know for myself, I am usually way too much in my head.

I make such a mountain out of a mole hill and then I go to do “the thing” (whatever that thing may be), and it’s rarely as big of a deal as I thought (even if it takes longer than I expected…).

What helps me is to focus on the task.

Example: When I sold List Explosion a while back I followed Ramit Sethi’s Breakthrough Launch email sequence.

That was literally all I did (the course is much more involved).

I promised myself that I would do exactly what he said to do with the emails. I didn’t think about my comfort level with the language or selling aspect.

I’ve followed him for years, he’s hugely successful, and he knows what he’s talking about.

Guess what?

The emails worked beautifully.

Next time I’ll do the full launch. This time was more about getting the course done and testimonials.

Trusting Yourself

This is a big one.

There is SO much of well, everything.

It is super easy to go sideways when you spend time looking at what other people are doing, selling, making, and marketing. One guru is telling you that you HAVE to be on YouTube.

Another is telling you that you need to run webinars, ads, join Tik Tok…

Here’s the thing.

ALL of those tactics work.

But if you don’t have your messaging and foundation in place, you’re going to be constantly chasing tactics.

The BEST thing you can do for your business is to take the time to get crystal clear on who you serve and the problems you solve.

Tune out all the distractions and take the time to do this work (which can feel a little overwhelming if you haven’t dug into it yet).

Read StoryBrand by Donald Miller.

Get crystal clear on who you’re serving. Go beyond the (yawn) customer avatar worksheet and get into the psychographics of your ideal customer or client (the type of person they are).

The next thing I’d do is map out what you want your life to look like as it relates to your business.

I know in order for me to really show up for myself and my audience I need a good amount of “white space” in my life.

In other words, uninterrupted time. What I do with that time depends on how I’m feeling. I may want to play with a new software platform, write some emails, map out a new course, or take a nap.

I consciously choose not to fill my calendar… I’d rather see the white space on my calendar while having a to-do list of what I’m working on and when it needs to be completed elsewhere.

Some people schedule everything.

I can’t.

I go into resistance and feel resentful.

This is a perfect example of how I Show UP for MYSELF.

Boundaries are GOLD

Unfortunately, we tend to figure out our boundaries by not having them… or is that just me?

I tend to get excited about things and leap before looking. I’ve accepted this is part of my process now and I’ve created a rule that I don’t commit to anything immediately. The goal is to give me at least 24 hours before responding to anything.

I’d love to tell you that I stick to this rule all the time, but I don’t. And when I don’t, I simply make a mental note for next time. I take responsibility for what I’ve committed to and show up.

Selling is Showing UP!

This is still something I deal with on a daily basis.

And I don’t know what it is, but this tends to be way more common in women than men. My therapist shared a reason for this with me and that is that men don’t operate from the relational part of the brain the way women do.

Whatever it is, you need to make the conscious choice to start selling or to be selling ALL. THE. TIME.

Every time you make an offer, send the email, publish, open the cart… you’re showing up.

Self-Care is Showing UP

Cue the other 3 Word Rebellion… F*ck the Hustle.

The hustle culture is quickly on its way out (you can quote me on this in a couple of years, but we’re starting to see the backlash and cry for balance).

If you don’t learn to find your own rhythm, you’re going to end up miserable.

Here’s a great article on how Tim Ferris has had a change of heart with his constant pursuit of how to be more productive.

Not everything that is meaningful can be measured easily.
– Tim Ferris

I used to thrive on how busy I was. The more I accomplished the more deserving I thought I was (of what I don’t know).

Now I relish in being able to chill in my family room with the fireplace on a rainy day, doing a little work, maybe napping, and checking out with a good book or movie.

Self-care isn’t just about massages, baths (both of which I adore), and getting rest.

It’s setting up your life in a way that serves YOU.

Not the die-hard 4 am club.

Part of why I started my business and have stuck with it all these years is the FREEDOM.

I spent so many years in retail management, and even a couple years owning my own retail store.

I never want keys to a building I don’t own again.

Or be worried that people are waiting for me. I LOVE that I control my schedule. 100%.

Self-care may be taking it easy one day and then “parenting” yourself the next day. Doing the things you’ve been putting off is just as much a part of taking care of yourself as is the rest.

Create what YOU want

This is definitely part of my rebellion.

There are best practices for things (think SEO, writing, recording, buying paid traffic, etc.) and then there are things that need to be said.

Or published.

Or produced.

Even if they don’t fit industry standards or guidelines.

If you feel in your gut and your heart that you want to do something differently… DO IT.

And then see how it worked.

Some of my most engaged content and traffic has come from work that has ZERO search engine optimization. I didn’t create it based on keywords, research, or a well-planned outline.

There is a balance with ALL of this.

Last, but not least…

Focus on Mastery

There is something amazing that happens when you allow yourself to focus on getting better at your craft.

You started your business for a reason… 

I have slowly fallen in love with writing and now the same thing is happening for me with copywriting (which truly blows my mind).

When I shifted my mindset to doing great work, it removed the pressure I had placed on myself to make sure my work was profitable.

I read something recently and don’t remember where it was or who wrote it, but it basically said that not every pursuit needs to have a profitable outcome.

I was a proficient writer when I first started blogging (i.e, I could write a paper for school and get an A), but I knew NOTHING about direct response marketing and writing in a way that connects with people.

It wasn’t until I started my podcast that I found my voice.

With a little (er, a LOT) of help from Grammarly, I’m pleased to say my English teachers would be proud (I swear I paid attention in school… but the truth is some of my earlier posts look as though I completely forgot how to use proper punctuation).

The sooner you focus on mastery, the sooner all the pieces of the puzzle start to fall in place.

My newfound love of copywriting, plus my love of writing (never in a million years did I think I’d say either of those things), has completely shifted how I think about sales pages, email copy, subject lines, social posts, headlines, how to sell, when to sell, why people buy…

… you get the point.

I am crystal clear on the vision for my business, the work that needs to be done, and that I will thoroughly enjoy every step of the journey.

Remember, YOU get to decide what your business looks like.

Choose to #JustShowUP.

Links from this episode

Books:

3 Word Rebellion by Michelle Mazur

The Obstacle is The Way by Ryan Holiday

The War of Art by Steven Pressfield

The Compound Effect by Darren Hardy 

Additional links:

Article: Tim Ferris’s Recent Change of Heart Shows How Self-Improvement Can Fail You

Article: How to Use Psychographics in Your Marketing: A Beginner’s Guide