In Loving Memory & A Personal Message of Hope

Kim and Chris

Today’s post is going to be a little bit different.

Let me preface it by saying this isn’t going to be a downer, quite the opposite (fingers crossed, that’s my intention).

Many of you know my personal story but I’m sure some of you don’t.

On May 7th, 2003, I received the call. The call I never thought I’d receive and one that changed my life forever.

This was the day I was told my husband had died in a car accident, coming home from work.

It happened to be my day off (I was a full-time store manager for HomeGoods) and I was out shopping for Mother’s Day cards.

My husband worked night shifts and when I woke up and he wasn’t home I thought maybe he had gone to a friend’s house, not common, but not really out of the ordinary either. I left him a voicemail and went about my day.

When my brother called me around 10 am I knew in my gut something awful had happened.

I was in the Hallmark store and remember feeling like the world around me stopped.

It was without a doubt the darkest day of my life.

My daughter was 6 at the time and my son was 2 1/2. I couldn’t fathom how I was going to explain what had happened to Daddy.

But I did.

Somehow I managed to get through that day, his service, and the following years.

Fast forward to today and my life is really, really good.

I never thought May 7th would roll around and I’d be able to wake up like it was a normal day.

I used to plan something for the anniversary every year. The first 6 or 7 years this was vitally important to me. I didn’t want the kids to forget and I needed to feel like I was honoring what we had.

As trite as it sounds, time does heal.

There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t miss him. I’ve been fortunate to have loving relationships in my life since then but haven’t found the guy that will be that lifetime partner yet.

That’s O.K., he’s out there somewhere.

To wake up today and not have the anniversary be the first thing on my mind was a blessing.

There is no way 14 years ago that I would have pictured my life as it is today.

I made a conscious choice 9 years ago to start my business so I could be around for my kids and do something that felt fulfilling.

Something that was mine.

I always knew there was something else I was supposed to do with my life. I know without a doubt I’ve found it.

It’s taken me longer than I expected (the true beauty of ignorance is bliss), but it’s been so worth it. The ups & downs, the financial challenges, the fears, the doubts…. all of it.

I wanted to share this with you today to remind you that no matter what you’re going through, you will get through it.

Let your voice be the only one that matters.

Know that the dark moments come, but you won’t stay there.

When you need a break?

Take it.

When you feel inspired to do something? Go in a different direction?

Do it.

The more I talk with people the more I realize we all have our own sh*t, we just don’t talk about it.

I also wanted to share this to say Thank You.

Thank you for being on this journey with me, sticking around with all the experimenting, testing, ranting, and changes in direction.

To say my heart feels full because of you would be an understatement.

I still have my dark moments. Then I get an email from someone who says I’ve inspired them. And my soul feels renewed and I get back on my path.

We live in some pretty amazing and crazy times right now.

The one thing that keeps me grounded is my connections.

My family, my friends, and YOU.

Know that no matter what happens, your dreams are worth pursuing.

With much appreciation,
Kim

Kim Doyal

Hi, I am Kim Doyal: Entrepreneur, Podcaster, ContentCreator, Optimist. Over 10 years into this online business journey, I believe that #EverythingIsContent and we can all #JustShowUP.

17 Comments

  1. Davinder Singh Kainth on May 7, 2017 at 12:18 pm

    Not just us in the virtual online world, I am sure… someone up there is also very happy seeing you happy and doing well.

    Holy moly… keep rocking!

    • Kim Doyal on May 7, 2017 at 1:10 pm

      Thanks, Davinder 🙂
      I always feel him with me, he was actually the computer person in the family! There’s always a little extra inspiration from above.

  2. Annalyn on May 7, 2017 at 12:34 pm

    You just made me cry again. I was crying when I did my daily meditation and then I decided to do some workouts. I happened to see that you shared this post on Facebook. Just in the that I needed these words.

    “Know that no matter what happens, your dreams are worth pursuing.”

    I am so sorry for what you have been through. And I am writing for you to find someone that you want to spend your lifetime with. Someone who will understand you and your dreams for yourself, your family and your business.

    Love,
    Annalyn

    • Kim Doyal on May 7, 2017 at 1:12 pm

      Hi Annalyn,
      Sorry to make you cry… but so often the tears are cleansing.
      Kudos on the meditation. I know when I’m consistent with that life feels so much more grounded.
      Always keep going girl. And if you ever need a reminder, just say the word.

      I’ll find that someone, I trust that without a doubt.
      Much love to you,
      Kim

  3. Jürgen Strauss on May 7, 2017 at 12:45 pm

    Thank you for all you do, Kim and for being so open and sharing. You are indeed an inspiration to so many of us!

    • Kim Doyal on May 7, 2017 at 1:12 pm

      Thank you Jurgen 🙂 It’s friends like you that make the journey worth it!

  4. Marianne on May 7, 2017 at 1:23 pm

    It’s just beautiful what you’ve done with your life. If anyone deserves what you have today it is you, Kim! You are an inspiration to me and so many others. And you’re also an amazing person to boot. Love ya girl!

    • Kim Doyal on May 7, 2017 at 1:50 pm

      Thanks Marianne <3
      So happy to have found a friend like you online, can’t wait to meet in person later this year!
      Love ya too!

  5. Todd Jones on May 7, 2017 at 2:43 pm

    I was feeling a little somber this morning, a little depressed. I couldn’t stay in the sanctuary during church service. I didn’t really do the bigger crowd very well. Then, I realized later that it was the anniversary of my father’s death, four years. My mom and I went to the graveside. Sometimes you just need to sit back and take some time to yourself I guess.

    Take care, my friend.

    • Kim Doyal on May 7, 2017 at 5:35 pm

      I couldn’t agree more Todd. Taking time to yourself is so vitally important when we’re feeling fragile.
      When your heart hurts it’s hard to show up in other areas.
      Much love to you & your family Todd. Thanks for sharing.

  6. Merri Dennis on May 7, 2017 at 5:07 pm

    I did not know your story, but have listened to and loved your perspective for the last couple of years. We lost my husband’s brother almost 10 years ago. His kids were 9 and 7 at the time. It has a been a rough journey for all of us.
    Thank you for sharing your story. I’m so glad that an anniversary date has come that is a normal day.
    I launched my WordPress business last fall and have been amazed at the joy it has brought into my life. Thank you for continuing to share your life and business journey with us.
    Many blessings to you and yours!

    • Kim Doyal on May 7, 2017 at 5:44 pm

      Thank you so much, Merri!
      The impact of the loss definitely carries throughout the entire family. I don’t know what I would have done without my family and friends.

      Congrats on launching your WordPress site last fall! WordPress is an amazing thing, it gave me my life back, that’s for sure. LOVE your site name!
      Thanks again for connecting.
      Have a wonderful week,
      Kim

  7. Gin on May 7, 2017 at 6:32 pm

    Kim, this is such a brave and touching post to write. Thank you so much for sharing it with us. As someone who lost her mum on Christmas Eve last year, I am still fresh from mourning. I know your experience was much different to mine, but the grief is the same and I thank you for reassuring me that time does heal. Thanks, Kim, you are truly amazing. Gin x

    • Kim Doyal on May 8, 2017 at 12:08 pm

      Hi Gin,
      Thanks so much. I’m so sorry to hear about your Mum. I’m really close with my Mom and can only imagine your heartache.
      All those trite sayings we hear (that don’t really help when you’re in the thick of things) are so true. There’s a beautiful song by Train I used to listen to when I felt I needed to connect with him (heads up, it’s a tear jerker). It’s called “When I Look to the Sky” from their My Private Nation album (2003).
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KipSEcE6gGM
      Thanks again Gin, so glad you’re a part of my journey! 🙂

  8. Tonya Mork on May 8, 2017 at 10:29 pm

    Kim,

    What an eloquent story of profound loss and then rebuilding your children’s and your life. We all know (or will know) the heartbreak of losing someone dear to us. I can’t imagine the magnitude of losing your spouse and then having to put life back together again for your kids. Wow.

    But what grabbed my attention and tugged at my heart were the hope and purpose woven into your words. You broke through life’s crushing trial. In your chapter two, you launched your business and found your professional purpose.

    Today, you’re able to recount such a painful time in your life, one to remember and honor his memory, but then two to inspire others. May I say, bravo!

    Virtual hugs coming your way,
    Tonya

    • Kim Doyal on May 9, 2017 at 8:42 am

      Hi Tonya,
      Thank you so much for your lovely comment.
      I’m so very grateful to be on the other side of it.

      The wonderful things that have come out of this loss (my business, new friendships, experiences) are what drive me every day.

      Thanks so much Tonya,
      Kim

  9. […] good example of a personal story is In Loving Memory & A Personal Message of Hope by Kim […]

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