Building Someone Else's Tribe – #BYOR

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I’d like to think I don’t learn everything the hard way, but this wouldnt be one of those times.

About 2 years ago I decided I needed to do things a little different. A LOT different. I used to use the excuse that I was too busy with client work to “show up” more in my business (and by show up I mean show up as myself, no more playing it safe).

I would blog as consistently as I could and share my content socially (although my social media efforts left something to be desired) and I felt “stuck”.

The ‘stuck’ feeling existed because I had created an idea of who I thought I was supposed to be. By choosing to brand myself as “The WordPress Chick” I felt like I should be all over the ‘code is poetry’ mentality but a coder is the last thing I ever wanted to be. I simply fell in love with WordPress 6 years ago, found I had a knack for explaining it to people and knew I could make a living doing something I loved.

The path to my showing up started with my decision to start my podcast. I didn’t have a strategy in place and I wasn’t too sure what I was going to talk about, especially since most of what I was doing then was video, but I didn’t care. I wanted to start a podcast and jumped in with both feet.

That’s when I realized the magic that is supporting other people.

I knew I didn’t want to do a ‘solo show’ only but I also didn’t want an ‘interview only’ show (I knew I had plenty to say), but I had NO idea that sharing what other people were doing and giving them the opportunity to share their story (because I wasn’t interested in doing a rinse & repeat style interview) would be life changing for me.

The simple act of reaching out to people that I wanted to interview (and I knew had something of value to share with my audience) has literally changed my life.

The relationships and opportunities that have shown up since starting the podcast continue to amaze me, but that’s not the lesson I learned the hard way. The lesson I learned the hard way was to trust myself.

But that’s not the point of this post. Because it took me so long to really show up as myself I realized it was much easier to show up and support other people while I figured out exacty what it looked like for me personally.

I remember exactly when I had this ‘lightbulb’ moment.

Someone had followed me on twitter and then shared my content. I went to follow up her back, liked what she was sharing and went to check out her site. When I got to her site she had a ‘coming soon’ page up (with an opt-in) and said to connect with her on Facebook while the site was being finished. When I went to her Facebook page I was in awe of the engagement and content. She was building a community (where her audience was) by sharing whatever she found that she thought would be valuable to her audience. She built an amazing following because she just wanted to share cool stuff! And she was super appreciative of my support of her (because then I tweeted about the awesome resources on her Facebook page)… and now we’re friends. 🙂

Here’s the thing though…EVERYTHING she shared was someone else’s content!

Of course I’m not saying you don’t want to share your own content, but in her case she didn’t have any yet and it didn’t stop her! It was the first time I really “got” that we have a chance to connect with people GLOBALLY- and I don’t mean just friending and following people all over the world. I also started paying attention to what other people shared. And one thing became glaringly obvious to me.

There were a handful of “old school marketers” who NEVER shared anyone else’s content.


Not once.


And it’s such a shame. There are SO many amazing people they’re missing out on (not to mention the impression you give off when all you do is talk about yourself). You just have to be willing to step outside of your comfort zone.

And the easiest way to do that is to help build someone elses tribe.

Share their content.

Interview them.

Reach out and ask how you can support them.

My challenge to you is to find someone NEW that you can support.

Even if you’re already supporting other people and sharing their content, it’s good to step out and find new people to share with your audience, just make sure they have something of real value to offer your audience. We all know when someone is a ‘super fan’ of someone else because they share everything that person does. And that’s fine… but there’s a fine line between sharing because it provides value to your audience and sharing because you adore someone.Make sure you’re on the value side of that sentence.

NOTE from Tea of Story Bistro: Once you’ve found someone new you can supportcome visit us on Facebook and share. Was it easy for you to do? Hard? No right or wrong answers here — we’re all just experimenting! Image credit: Leyton Parker

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  1. Yay for lightbulb moments! When working with clients for their social media, I have them share other people’s work simply because of your thinking. What goes round can come round too. And I’ve yet to meet the person who can tell everything on their own blog. There are some awesome blogs that have many contributors which helps build out a tribe even wider. The World Wide Web is not a web trap, it is a web woven with the threads of the people who are part of it.
    BTW, I love the way your comment acknowledges my website link! This one is one of 3-4 that I keep up and is a current local mission/client that I love to promote

    1. Thanks JudyAnn!
      Yea… with a little effort and follow through you can truly create amazing connections and relationships online. I know I have. 🙂
      The plugin that links to your post is the Comment Luv plugin.

    1. Thanks Tea… I think it becomes habit more than anything else but that also takes the fun out of finding new cool people & content to share.

    1. Haha..yea, using hashtags and searching via Twitter is a great way to find new people and content. I tend to do lots of digging too… see an ad on Facebook, follow the page, check out the comments, etc. 🙂 And of course participating in things like #BYOR is another easy way to connect with like minded people.

  2. Kim, Hi, I’m in the Blooming group too. Your article is so refreshing. I’m already dancing on this path, and I’m amazed to feel the resistance/fear that comes up in me reading your three suggestions at the end. I’m happily sharing resources with my tribe, but haven’t been directly engaging with the people I admire whose work I share.

    So, let me step into audacity and out of fear with you! I’m not only gonna share this, I’m also asking you how I can support you. I’m sincere; let me know what I can do.

    Love and blessings to you!

    1. Hi Sue,
      Thanks SO much! Simply sharing my stuff is SUPER helpful or a review in iTunes if you listen to the podcast (some great interviews if I do say so myself about entrepreneurship!). It took me much longer than I care to admit about stepping into sharing and connecting with other people. Now I just go with what feels right and I’m having a ball!
      I’m looking forward to connecting with you more.

  3. Love your post Kim!

    I found the quickest way to grow and to make new friends is to help share other people’s content everyday.

    And of course, to thank anyone that shares my content too, along with friendly chit chat.

    Tribes work very well and people appreciate feeling like they are connecting with real people who have similar interests and goals.

    1. Thanks Sicorra,
      It’s definitely one of the easiest ways to start connecting & engaging, and people trust you more as well. It’s also important to remember to share your OWN stuff as well, especially if it’s for business.
      Thanks again,

  4. Hi Kim:

    I’ve heard this solid advice, not only from you, but many other smart folks. Being a curator of information that your audience can benefit from is valuable. It doesn’t matter what the source of that information is.

    Most people that I look up also follow this axiom, and realize it doesn’t diminish their spotlight at all to share someone else’s.

    1. Thanks for the comment John!
      Yea, it seems like such a basic principle, right? The only people that don’t seem to do this (in my opinion), are the old school marketers who got started before content became such a solid strategy and for the most part, necessary.
      Plus, it’s just more fun. 🙂 Sharing other people’s content is a great connector.
      Have an awesome day!

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